HOW MUCH POWER ARE YOU GIVING A WORD?
How much power are you giving to the perception of others?
I can remember the very first time I received an email telling me how ashamed I should be of myself and that I should set a better example to people around me. I read that email at least a dozen times. Ashamed….a better example…but why? My email included an informative guide to helping people showcase their online businesses and I should be ashamed over my language? Key word should. I read that email at least a dozen times. Ashamed….a better example…but why? My email included an informative guide to helping people showcase their online businesses and I should be ashamed over my language? Who was this women and why would she spend her time worrying about my example to the community? Why wouldn’t she just hit unsubscribe?
I felt as if my world had been shattered. I drafted several responses from, go fuck yourself, to I’m sorry I offended you. It took me a few days to reply and I really had to do some soul searching as to how a word would hold that kind of power. Luckily, I came to the realization that I didn’t owe her an apology. I just responded with- hit that unsubscribe button and do not contact me again. I learned a powerful lesson from that email. I finally understood how much energy it took for someone, who was not my target audience, to waste emailing me. I could see it clear as day. Saying FUCK has made me a better person. Not one who cowers in shame over a four letter word. If I had let that women’s email stifle my true inner mission, I would be back to square one.
Square one for me was stuck in a miserable job. Wishing every day that a truck would hit me on the freeway just so I could have a change. That’s the lowest of lows. The reason I say fuck is because I never want to go back to that head space. AND I keep saying fuck because I will never let one person’s perception of me hold power against me. This is your wake up call.
I wasn’t always a women with pink hair who dropped f-bombs of empowerment. I used to be scared, trapped with fear, judgement and even at times, a total bitch. I gave power to things like the word fuck and I only whispered it when I stubbed my toe or in my head when people were extra mean. I was a pretty “good girl” and that’s where the problem lies. I was good and followed what I felt society wanted me to do. Have kids, marriage, a job and everything that comes from living in suburbia Utah. However, it just never felt like me. Saying the word f*ck publicly and vocally didn’t magically change everything about my world, but instead it gave me back a huge portion of my power. There wasn’t a glorious time that I first remember saying fuck on a live video or in a blog post. It was just an evolution.
4 Reasons Why Saying Fuck Made Me A Better Person.
1. I released societal pressures. You have no idea how much you are holding back when you are editing every single thing you say. This goes far beyond the big f bomb. Think about all those things you really want to say. The things that are literally bubbling up inside you right now. The words that you shove back down inside your throat because you don’t think it’s what your audience wants to hear. You slap on branding that doesn’t feel like you and you pretend that it’s all sunshine and rainbows. Try switching your perception from what you think people want to hear and just start saying what YOU want to hear. Huge release.
2. It caused me to give less fucks. Seriously. Once I embraced this tiny four letter word (which is all it really is) I also stopped caring what others thought of me. There’s so much freedom that comes when you quit giving a fuck. You just flow. You open up and you literally flow! You stop worrying about offending people or if your message is the right message. YOU JUST SHOW UP. CONSISTENTLY. You show up as the real you. It also caused me to give a whole lot less fucks about other people too. I’m more open and receptive to various opinions and lifestyles. It’s funny how that happens.
3. I attracted my tribe. As you can clearly tell, that lady from the email, not my tribe at all. Do not waste your time attracting the wrong type of people to you. If someone can’t handle me saying fuck, they definitely can’t handle my straight forward attitude. Not everyone is for me and that’s pretty damn okay! If I was trying to please everyone in this world, I’d be screwed.
4. I started having more fun. It’s funny what can happen when you start embracing who you are, releasing other’s people power over you and step into total flow. You start having fun. Lots of fun. It’s not fun to try and edit yourself or fit into someone else’s box. I can tell you with a 100% guarantee, when you start just doing you, your life is full of adventure. Spread those wings and fly!
Yes, I say fuck in a professional setting and yes I will continue to. I own my own business and there’s not anyone sitting around editing me. I’m not saying f bombs should be a part of your strategy, after all you have to decide if its really right for you. Just ask yourself this, what are you holding back from? Or better yet, who are you holding back from?
It’s time for you to just do you AND that makes you a better person all around.
I’m SAMANTHA PARKER, the cofounder of Badassery Magazine.
Now I’m teaching others how to build their own online empires. Yes, empires. I believe that building and nurturing a sense community with your business is the key to massive success.
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